Author Archives: Alice in Wonderland

About Alice in Wonderland

Ssshhh! exploring the Rabbit Hole! ...But if you must; then just: - know i believe in trust - do not care for lust - love the pizza crust

Today I don’t feel like doing anything


I woke up 2 hours ago, that is at 4am. No, I’m not a morning person. I wake up against the will and wishes of my bed as there are places I have to be at and things that I have to do.

But today I don’t feel like doing anything.

Not because I’m lazy but because I’m tired. We live in a world that is extremely demanding. Have you done this? Have you done that? Yoga? Gym? Flower arrangements ? Laundry? Pammi Aunty ko phone kiya? It’s crazy. It truly is. Every person expects you to be superman. When all you want to do is catch a good surf.

I often wonder why people have expectations from us? Is it because they feel the need to make us feel that we need to be some one? Or be doing something ‘worthwhile’ with our time? Or are they so needy, that they need us to be there for them and be doing things that they cannot themselves do?

Why is it that people have such great expectations from us?


De rerum natura


“And that’s the nature of things”. I remember my Dad saying this to me on two occasions and I wish to never forget how it rang a bell; multiple bells; when he said it. It’s like a tube light that went on inside my head.

De rerum natura

We are always so consumed by our own thoughts of what is right, not right, what is and isnt. What should be and should not be. We forget a simple rule. No fingers are alike. Yet, when we look for companionship or friendship, we first always assess common grounds. Unfamiliar territories are mostly never explored, or ventured into unwilling.

I pause to think about it. make a mental note to remember to never forget it and not blow my lid every time. With peace made with thyself, I continue to do my yoga… And then I feel the more yoga I do, the more angrier I get. It’s good, because then Im angry with me, for not trying to accept people as they are… Accept Things as it is… Accept fate, accept destiny. Accept and not fight it. By then class is over. What I do take back home is a happier me, thankful for the wisdom, thankful for parents such as mine, only to return the next day, with the same dilemma.

Why can’t people be more like me? Why can’t things be the way I want them to be?

Yes, The most fun I’ve had is with people who are exact opposite to me, at times and in situations which were beyond my control (I’m a very controlling person!). I do blow up my lid every now and then when I didn’t get what I wanted or when people didn’t behave/ react the way I wanted them to. I try and remember what my dad said, “and that’s the nature of things”.

And then I secretly wish my Dad never told me that…

Anchors Away!


They say when haunted by a Ghost, there is only one way to get rid of it – accept it’s presence and then release it.

Life is similar. When our worst fears materialize, we need to accept reality and then move on. The fear will eventually diminish. Yea, it’s easier said than done. That’s why I’m saying it. It’s also easier to say it coz I’ve done it. 12.12.12 the date I thought I’d pull up the anchor and sail aboard ‘happily married’ to Wifedom. Too bad it didn’t happen, on my decided date. Too good it didn’t happen, till date. You see Life keeps telling us, “you are happy, wherever you are”. Too bad we are busy looking the other way. Wondering where the hell is the boat? Did I miss it? Guess what? You haven’t. Maybe because the Captain ain’t ready. Or maybe because he died on his way to the Harbour (yes, not everyone is made for someone. If they were, we wouldn’t have the crazy cat lady). You can call me sadist or cynical. I’m neither. I’m the eternal optimist. So what if I cannot be happy always. Who is? No, one one is, not always. Not every time.

So im gonna set sail on that boat either ways. What the fun in having a boat and not bumping it off some rough waves? The Captain be damned! I’ll not gonna only pull the blessed anchor away, but order full steam ahead. Change the name to ‘happily single’. after all, I’m Alice. No anchor, no date can keep me down. So what if i cannot be happy always? I’m gonna try and be. And that’s something right. Worse comes to worse, i’d atleast have an adventure out of it. What a story would that be now!

!Happy 2013!

Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon


I’m quite glad I didn’t hit the ‘yes, I’m sure’ button, a few seconds back. Had I done so, I would be writing this post under another name. I would keep my blog name intact. I love Alice in Wonderland. The story and the meaning. It gives me a sense of freedom, of relief. Obviously, because it was the only fairy-tale where the Damsel in Distress didn’t need saving from some stupid Prince. I wish you could see me roll my eyes. Stupid stupid Prince. (More rolling eyes). Moving on. For auld lang syne, I have pondered over hiding my domain name. Not under the carpet. No, I do not belong under the carpet! But somewhere in the esoteric cyberspace. To be stumbled upon those seeking, not me! but adventures similar to those of Alice in Wonderland.

Oh but how tired I am for those potential matches trying to judge me by what I write. Dude, one thing you gotta know, is that I write completely different from what I think. My writing is my meditation, if you’ll have it. It’s those moments when I get lost in my own words. Lost in my own world. It’s ME time. So lets pretend that I’m not in this room and that you cannot see me through that thin curtain and that for the time till I finish my piece, I do not exist.

Too bad you cannot do that. Stupid stupid Prince o’mine! Too bad you are forcing me to turn anonymous. Though that is something I should have done long ago. For this world is not a stage, but a courtroom, where your every thought will be mocked upon, every action judged, every friend masked with betrayal.

Behold thee in your eyes, dear Prince, for what I may seem to you, am not. I am the leaf that will dance to the tune of the wind. Sometimes pleasantly, sometimes so rough, that I may slit your very eye, in which I reside. Do not judge me, my dearly beloved, for I was told that you’d ne’er come and alas I roam this desert alone, seeking your reflection in the mirage.

Thus I change my existence to infinity and beyond. After all, nine to the dozen does equate to one hundred and eight.

Diwali – The Festival of Lights


I love Diwali. Not because its nice to watch all those crackers go up in smoke or the umpteen number of lights/divas/candles adding to global warming. I’m an environmentalist.

I love the festival (I’m a Gujju. Diwali starts almost a week in advance. To be calendar-ly precise, 3 days in advance) because of what it signifies. The victory of good over evil. The victory of righteous over selfish. A constant reminder that no matter how dark the times are (Kartik being the darkest month), a small diya can guide a long forgotten soul home (Lord Shri Ram). That no matter how dark the times are, a small prayer to Maa, be it Lakshmi, Kali, Saraswati or your own Mother, will bring in prosperity, strength and wisdom. After all all mothers want nothing short than the best for their children. That no matter how dark the times are, a new day is just around the corner!

And when that day comes, the dark times will fade; a New Year will begin. An opportunity to turn anew again. To try once more, to relive old promises, to be better at fulfilling them. To be righteous in your own accord. To cease to be selfish with those who care for you most. To let go of Evil and to learn to accept more Good. To remember that Karma is as important, if not more than Dharma. Rote praying to God will not earn you any brownie points. Your actions need to speak for themselves.

It’s just one festival. Honestly. But so much to learn. So much to see. So much to observe. Yes, there are other reasons why I love Diwali. If I let you in on all that, then there will be nothing more to write next year!

Wishing everyone a Happy Diwali and a Prosperous New Year!

That’s all Folks! Let there be Light, more on the inside, than outside 🙂

The Punchnama of Life


I came across this mutated saying last night. At first I laughed at it, as I assumed the person had forgotten the saying. As the wasabi cracker fired up my nostrils, the epiphany hit my brain stronger than the flavored cracker. So here it is, some food for thought. Do think about it, only then you will realize too.

Life has given you lemonade. You are making lemons out of it

Courtesy my Buddhist friend

The Solitary Reaper


{Dedicated to The Buddhist … “Promise me you’ll always remember: You’re braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.”}

They say being solitary is often a sign of weakness. An indication to those willing to join forces with you, to be ware. A hermit, some may call, an anchoret, the others. The reaper is judged for existing this way, for there must be some reason, why one chooses to be this way. A scandal is what they are looking for so they can gossip about, sitting by the pool in a fur. Hoping that it (scandal) be better then their own so they can escape and be society’ own.

But my dear friend, they (the world at large) are nothing but noise, laughing, frolicking at other’s fortune, believing it to be misfortune. It is a choice, a tough, often option less choice, yet a choice, to exist in solitude. To chose not to be or to be, is after all a choice too. (Yes, it really is a choice.) Because the Noise around us likes being loud and enjoys screwing its point right into our brain, we often are forced to hear it out, if not listen. And at this point, we would have concluded that something maybe wrong within, after all! Right you are, the point is wrong, absolutely!

The Solitary Reaper does not need people to be confident for he knows he is a valuable person, on this own. The confidence comes from within, when he learns that he is braver than he believed and stronger than he seemed. Being in solitude with one’s self is a remarkable force in itself. It requires a lot of courage and with time, it only makes you stronger, independent of the Noise and at peace with yourself. Solitude teaches you not only to be your best friend, but also to observe mundane things in an unconventional way, in a new light. Above all, solitude gives you the luxury of being alone with your thoughts. So appreciate the silence, talk to that inner voice, and see where all it leads you! This is my promise to you, my friend, the new place where you will stand next, is nothing short of an adventurous journey. Cherish the moment that you are in now, for this will be the pedestal for all your future happiness.

So hold your head, nor high, nor low, but richt between your shoulders. Remember there is no rhyme nor reason to exist in solitude except that solitude is positive. Fill your self with it and you will see that you light up the path, on which you walk alone.

P.S. you know where I will be, when disillusion replaces your light within.
look into your soul, for that is where I will be, your inner voice, who also walks alone.